Victory Valley, Roanoke, VA
Conditions: 52 deg. F, misty rain
PAX: Bundy, Dairy Queen, Freddie Mac, not Herschel, Legz, Pipeline, Tollbooth, Zebra
Q: Pipeline
Even though it wasn’t really raining, we audibled to the parking deck to take advantage of the pain and suffering amenities it offered. There was a thorough and science-based warmup of all major muscle groups at the cars promptly at 5:30, followed by a long run of about 50 feet to the first ramp on G.
The Thang: In honor of the round of 16 in March Madness (absent: UVA), we did a 16 and basketball-themed workout: 16 stationary exercises at the bottom of the ramp. Then a suicide on the ramp: run halfway up, back down and then all the way up. Finally, run the entire length of the straightaway, touching every webbing and alternating right and left arms. Zebra also faked a pass each time because he’s an ass man. I mean assist man.
The first exercise was 16 burpees and there were a bunch more, taking us up to 6 and about halfway back down, but everyone agreed that it was touching all the webbings that was horrible, and that Dairy Queen should be fined for thinking of it. We jogged back to G, did a quick round of Mary and then called it quits at exactly 6:15.
Freddie Mac said there’d be terrible trail runs and incredibly long, painful bike rides over the weekend for anyone who was into sadomasochism. Then Dairy Queen took us away in under 30 seconds. Lastly, you couldn’t even tell Tollbooth had a Wendy’s Baconator for breakfast on the way to the workout. Great job.
An honor and a privilege!