Monday night. 9PM. At a bar. Several bourbons down. Twitch says he will try to make a return to F3 on Wednesday morning with an old friend from Poland. Friend from Poland thinks of 100 excuses to not have to wake up at 5AM to work out. More drinks follow.
Tuesday. 3PM. At work. Dr. Twitch (thats what he’s called at work) reiterates they will make an appearance. I don’t believe him. He closes my office door to reassure me he can do merkins and squats with his bad back. He does 1 each. Says “Yep, good to go”
Tuesday night. 11:30PM. Last email from Twitch. More drinks, they will never make it tomorrow morning.Maybe time to think of a different Q.
Wednesday morning. Early. I set up cones, do some merkins, make my way to the bottom of the deck. Its 5:25. No cars. WTF. Double Humpee rolls in. We notice a few cars in the parking lot. Seriously its pouring and they park over there??? Monday it was a light mist and everyone came straight to the deck. Eventually they get the message and drive over to the deck. Dunphy tries to run me over. Guess he wants to Q. No Twitch. Yellow jeep coming in hot. 5:30 so we do burpees while we wait. Theres the Twitch-mobile. Holy crap he and the Polish FNG made it.
Short jog to the other side of the deck to warm up.
Side straddle hops…IC…moderate pace for first 50. Fast pace for the second 50. That killed most of the mumble chatter. Rubios – 40 IC. Arm circles – 40 IC each direction. People’s chair (all PAX do 10 count, then 5 count on the second go round). Good enough…lets go
Over to the ramp. Partner up and do partner pushes up the ramp. Switch and next partner pushes up the next ramp. Dunphy went 110% effort. I have the bruises to prove it. Guess he couldn’t run me over, so we tried to rip my arms off. Definitely would have made the next bit hard.
Twitch was lost at this point. So we did recon, found him, and encouraged his return to the group.
On to the thang: Merkins and squats for Twitch. Using the parking spaces we did a merkin/squat ladder. Each spot we increased merkins/squats by 1. Up to 15. Then we worked our way back to 1, subtracting one merkin/squat per spot. This got us up to the top of the ramp. 100 LBCs just for a different type of pain. Then turn around and repeat going down the ramp. (The merkins felt a lot more like derkins at this point). If you did them all (way to go Space Jam!!!) you did 450 merkins/squats. Probably more than Twitch envisioned when he did 1 in my office.
Times up.
Welcome FNG Layover! Have a safe flight back.